further into her father’s fatal car wreck, hopes the baseball team she manages
can reclaim the state crown, aches for Derek…or, no…maybe Alec…maybe. And she
mostly wishes to retract the hateful words she said to her dad right before
slamming the door in his face, only to never see him again.
All her desires get sidelined, though, when she overhears two fellow students
planning a church massacre. She doubts cops will follow up on her tip since
they’re sick of her coming around with notions of possible crimes-in-the-works.
And it’s not like she cries wolf. Not really. They’d be freaked too, but
they’re not the ones suffering from bloody dreams that hint at disaster like
some crazy, street guy forecasting the Apocalypse.
So, she does what any habitual winner with zero cred would do…try to I.D. the
nutjobs before they act. But, when their agenda turns out to be far bigger than
she ever assumed, and even friends start looking suspect, the truth and her
actions threaten to haunt her forever, especially since she’s left with blood
on her hands, the blood of someone she loves.
title-holding, undeafeated Cedar Creek Colts. Yeah, baby. I can bring my stat
sheet on our date. No, I will. I am
on a serious tear right now. Your eyes will bug out when you see how awesome I
am. Maybe I’ll even get some. I only swing female though. Sorry, dudes and
no direction or self-respect. I don’t want some wise girly girl digging into
stuff that is none of her business, holding out for months on end, putting me
on schedule where I have to check in and deal with drama when I don’t. I don’t
want the stares of consternation, the purses to hold, the umpteen texts all freakin’
day, the disapproving mothers…okay maybe that, just for kicks.( It would be
funny to get a few gawks or to schmooze a few. Oh the power I wield!)
Yeah, I really tried to think about something else I want. My face even did
that scrunching thing and everything, but, nah. Nothing. That’s it. Too many
girls are way out of my league or outside of my interest threshold. Some, you
can just tell, will end up goddesses when they emerge into adulthood, wings
spread like butterflies, fire in their eyes. And I can’t deal with that.
think that goddesses are those with a rack the size of Montana, and just as big
an appetite for, well, ME. Sure, in my head, that works, not gonna lie. It
works a lot. But, in reality, I find the real goddesses to be those women who
do everything for their families or who give to people they don’t even know,
like the ladies serving meals every week at the homeless center just because
they WANT to and not because it’s court-ordered. That act of selflessness,
making your existence count, pulls the world together, gives hope for humanity
and provides support so a few lucky souls can meet their potential and
aspirations. What’s a goddess if she can’t have an impact? Nothing is more
powerful than being able to shape the future and destiny.
mom’s in the ground and has been for a very long time. Since I was eight. And I am on the fast track to
destruction. I have no sense of boundaries or any conviction. I obliterated all
that. I cannot experience love. I’ve shut myself out, and now all I feel is a
biting cold and a fiery fury. I am an island in a sea of petty, stupid people.
It is both suffocating and lonely as hell. I have no one to tell me my ideas
are dumb, no one to tell me everything’ll be okay, no one to boss me around, no
one to dry my tears when the guilt of my past catches up with me (yes, I cry,
okay, lamebrain? But if you let that get out, I swear, you will taste the kind
of fury I am talking about!!!!! Seriously.)
hobo whores in the middle of the mall or something with their “What-EV-ERS!”
and their stupid, punkass eye rolls, I want to drill them in their stupid
stank-face faces and say, “Wise the hell up, man. At least you have a mom.”
braiding mystery, suspense & romance with some kind of weirdness. Her
addictions to crazy coffee concoctions, Funny Bones, Ben & Jerry’s, and
bacon keep her running and writing. She currently lives in New England with a
comedian stud and a wild gang of kidlets.